liberazoth | oh, rebelling sound of young wings, they still embrace the name of the blowing wind;

To tell you the truth… I think she does think that, at least on some level.

[ Why go through the trouble at all if she doesn’t believe in her own methods?

Though that little train of thought is immediately broken by the way Vayne all but chokes down that sip.

Kurapika can’t help it—he laughs. ]

Not used to it?

Aha ... That obvious, huh.

[ it's sheepish, wry— well, yeah. it's very clearly something he doesn't much indulge in. no disguising or hiding that.

he traces a circle around the rim of his glass, lapsing back into silence for a moment. ]

In a way, it's kind of sad ... But, well. Nevermind. What were you thinking about before I got here?

Pretty obvious.

[ But Vayne isn’t the only one. Kurapika has just gotten used to hiding his reaction, which he does as he takes another sip, the warmth of the alcohol filling his body pleasantly despite the taste. ]

I was thinking about Shinobu, that execution, my memories, and what we’ll do from here.

[ In short, his thoughts are a bit of a jumbled mess, his mind flitting from one thing to the next. ]

... I guess that's probably most of us right now, isn't it.

[ a lot sure has happened in the last 48 hours. it's ... a lot to tackle, all at once.

well. he doesn't know. maybe some of their number, the more certain of themselves, aren't contorting themselves into increasingly complicated shapes over this. what must it be like to have that kind of self-assurance... but as it is, he is not those people.

one thing at a time. ]

... What about Shinobu, exactly?

It’s strange, having a friend defend me like that. I know it wasn’t just me she was trying to protect, but…

[ He shakes his head. A friend dying as a result of trying to protect him? It’s one of his worst fears. ]

I’m worried about her, about how she may feel after all of that. It’s not easy, knowing you could have died, only to have someone else die in your place.

Do you think she'd feel guilty about surviving?

[ vayne doesn't know her as well. still, both shinobu and beelzebub had, in their own ways, seemed to make their peace with their own imminent deaths.

but then, maybe it's not about surviving but the cost of it. or maybe it's just fine to think about it in the abstract until it actually becomes real. ]

... What's so strange about it, though? It... seems pretty normal to me that a friend would try to protect you, or keep you from getting hurt. Even if you might not really want them to be putting themselves in danger like that...

I do.

[ Shinobu is kind, and Kurapika fully believes that. She’s very much the person that would feel guilty over it, at least on some level.

Vayne’s other question isn’t as easy for him to answer, and he needs another long sip of his drink and a moment for the burn of it to settle into his bones as warmth. ]

I never want to lose a friend because they were looking out for me. It’s why I work alone back home. That I couldn’t prevent her from going to such lengths because I was unconscious…

[ He shakes his head. ]

It unsettles me.

... I don't know if you could've stopped her even if you were awake. If she's that good of a friend... Well, I guess maybe you could have stopped her from anything too much. But not from wanting to protect you.

[ another idle, slow swirl of his glass. another, slightly better tolerated sip, the warmth settling somewhere deep enough in him he doesn't much notice it. ]

I know that because my friends are the same way.

There's only so much control I have over that, isn't there?

[ The only thing he could do is simply not have friends, but that would be impossible in a place like this. There's nowhere to go or hide from everyone else, after all. ]

My friends back home are like that as well, only I didn't remember it fully until earlier today.

[ He sighs, resting his elbows on the bar counter in front of him. The alcohol is already working its magic, making his tongue a little looser than it normally would be. ]

I think it does more than unsettle me. It scares me, knowing people will do whatever they want for my sake, and I won't be able to change their mind.

It scares you, huh...

[ they both know the consequences of having people care for them, it seems. ]

Yeah. Me too. But all the same...

I don't think that kind of control over other people is something you'd want to have. The kind of power that can force other people to do what you want...?

[ well. wielded bluntly, that sure sounds like what makima and adela are doing here. but something quieter, more subtle? a soft warping of reality's weave, until no one involved knew otherwise? that might just be even scarier. at least with the more forceful approach that makima and adela have taken, they know that something's wrong. ]

[ It's odd, isn't it, just how much they relate to one another when it comes to that?

Watching Makima command Noah to do as she wished and keep him from intervening was a dull ache of a reminder of what he could do himself, and of what he's used on others. For a moment, he contemplates telling Vayne that he knows exactly what it's like to force someone to do what he wants, at least on some level.

After little debate, he decides to go ahead and reveal it anyway. ]

...It isn't pleasant.

[ He extends his little finger. ]

Judgment Chain. I can give someone an order, and if they disobey, a stake will pierce through their heart and kill them. [ His gaze shifts from his finger and over to Vayne. ] The ease with which our captors use their abilities to control us is telling. I wonder if they wrestle with their sense of morality over it.

[ He doubts it. ]

[ that ... does give vayne some pause, but mostly in the sense that he needs to rearrange some thoughts. slot this one here. move that one there. kurapika, after all, has made no secret of his goals, nor to the extents of which he'd go to pursue them. and while perhaps vayne would never necessarily agree...

'but would you use it on your friends?' is the question vayne doesn't bother asking. kurapika wouldn't be afraid of this if he were willing to. ]

... All she had to do was say something. I don't know how it is for her, but it's pretty much the same thing for me. All I have to do is want something strongly enough.

[ all he has to do is wish. maybe that's why the idea of being able to speak a command like that into being bothers him so much. it could so easily be a warped mirror of what he's capable of, whether consciously or not. ]

I don't even know how much I can do. I don't know if I'd even realize if I was, depending.

Somehow... I don't think she worries about this sort of thing the same way.

[ To want something enough? That's terrifying in its own right, Kurapika thinks. Is that the kind of ability that has control over its user rather than the other way around? Is that an ability that one could ever really have full control over?

Makima certainly seems to carry that control herself, and Kurapika thinks that is what is most threatening about her. ]

No, I don't think she does either. Which means that she could use it for just about anything, no rules or strings attached, so to speak.

[ No worrying about how she'll hurt someone with it, far from the worries Kurapika and Vayne both carry on their shoulders. ]

At least... we know how big of a threat she could be now. We're at least aware of who we're dealing with on some level, even if we don't know everything we'd like to.

[ it's certainly the kind of ability that becomes more terrifying the more one considers it.

a pause. another moment's breather to drain his glass just a little more. ]

... We've talked a lot about Miss Makima so far, huh.

[ there's something ... vayne tries to think back, and turn over what little he's seen of the two ladies interacting. he can't put his finger on what it is, but... ]

What do you think of Adela?

I find her... strange.

[ He can't quite his finger on it, the way she offers them baked goods and delicious food alongside an execution, or the way she looks downtrodden with each and every killing. There's something distinctly off. ]

Does she even want to go through all of this? She seems more shaken than some of us, sometimes.

oh, rebelling sound of young wings, they still embrace the name of the blowing wind;

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